Walking Rocks?

Query: When I was in Death Valley earlier this year, I saw some enormous 750-pound rocks that appear to travel across the desert on their own. I remembered your article about rock tortoises, and wondered if that’s what these rocks could be?

Corn of Plenty (Part 4 of 4): A Field Guide by Dr. Midas Welby

Corns of the Air: Air-corns utilize their horns for jousting, playing tic-tac-toe, and spearing food in mid-flight. Air-corns often lurk undetected in trees, wood piles, and rain gutters. When bored, they use their horns to ring the doorbells of unsuspecting humans. When the door begins to open, the air-corn flies away.


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Going On Hiatus

December 6, 2014: I am loving college, but I have to admit, I’m overwhelmed.

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Pine Cone Feeders

A Present For Imaginaries: When winter comes, I get concerned about providing extra shelter from the elements for Imaginaries. Recently, I read about people who build wildlife brush shelters out of branches and plants in their yards, and thought this was a great idea.

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Query: Last week, someone came by on horseback at night and picked all the orange blossoms from the top of one of the trees in my family’s orchard. I took photos of all the tracks and marks I could find, and have been studying them. I think our visitor could be a centaur. My sister says no, it’s just someone on a horse who wanted to pick some flowers, but then why would the hoof prints come directly to a tree and stop, instead of drawing up alongside? And how could a man on horseback reach 10-12 feet up into the air to pick the blossoms? He left behind a handprint on one of the higher branches. I also found a single hair from a horse’s tail looped carefully over one of the lower branches, almost as if he meant for me to find it. I’m sending you photos of the tracks and handprint, but I’m keeping the horsehair.

Answer: Based on the tracking evidence you present to us, we agree with you that a centaur, and not a human horseman, is visiting your orchard. We note in particular two hoof prints which are very deep, indicating that the centaur may have reared up on his hind legs to reach apples higher on the tree. This also explains the partial handprint you found on that upper branch, which the centaur may have grasped to steady himself while picking flowers.

We only dimly understand the ways of centaurs. Possessed of a superior intelligence to that of humans, centaurs have deliberately separated themselves from our species for many centuries. You are fortunate indeed to find this evidence of a centaur passing through your neighborhood.

Centaur tail-hair is fabulously rare, and therefore very valuable. Centaurs don’t use any sort of monetary system in their own transactions, but understand that humans do. We imagine that the centaur may have left the horsehair behind in thanks, or perhaps in payment for the flowers he took. We applaud your intention to keep the tail-hair as a rare and wonderful gift from a rare and wonderful being, rather than exchange it for common money.


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